Sometimes it is hard to give thanks when you feel so low. I have been feeling so sick and so tired lately. No energy and just feeling like I am useless in many areas in my life.
Let’s be honest. This baby is kicking my butt!
This pregnancy is just totally different than my first. I have had a really hard time embracing this. I have been so sick this past week that it has brought me to a place I haven’t been in about 4 years. Not wanting to bother anyone about this, I kind of drew back from friends and just not communicating with anyone. Yesterday I decided to write out my thoughts to my group of mommy friends. They came back and either just gave me a cyber hug, or gave me stories that they can relate to. It was a blessing.
Today I woke and decided I need to get myself over this hump.
Today I am 16 weeks pregnant. I have 24 weeks left to go. Almost half way there.
Today I decided that I needed something more. I drove into work and was listening to the radio. The first thing I heard was a story about Kroger stores giving Thanksgiving meals to needy families. They shared a story of one family and it brought me back. I decided I needed to figure out how I could give so someone else had a Thanksgiving meal to share with their family. I came to work and immediately went to Kensinton Church’s website and saw that they were indeed giving out Thanksgiving meals to families in need. It isn’t a lot, but it started me feeling better.
Then, I decided to listen to a service. I have been, for a few months, needing to go to church. Todd and I were looking for something that fit our needs. We know Kensington is the church we like, but with them being 45 minutes away, we really wanted something closer. But we have not found that. I can listen to Kensington on-line. So, I listened. Wow, it spoke to me. I need to make time for myself and what I need and go to the church I enjoy. I usually take photos on Sundays both in the morning and in the evening. I need to honor myself and go to church instead. Yes, I can listen on-line, but it isn’t the same. Katie also loves going when she goes with my mom. So, I know this is what we need to do. Katie and I are going to go on Wednesday for dinner and Thanksgiving service. I am thrilled!
So… giving thanks… I give thanks for:
- knowing myself enough to know what I need to feel better
- my husband who has really been so great
- friends who listen and support
- being able to give
- the dinner with my family tonight
- Katie’s joy
- my creative abilities
- the days I can keep my mouth shut
- this baby growing inside